His, Hers, & Ours

While I was off on my amazing vacation I got a strange message. It was a note from a childhood friend of The Douche’s. We’ll call her Shelly. The content was arguably innocuous, a drive-by missive, if you will.

Just wanted to say that I hope you’re well! Always thought you were a nice gal from what I knew of you. Anyhow hope you don’t think i’m a weirdo for saying hi! lol

I do in fact think it is a little weird, thank you very much. In 14 years, I met this person maybe 2 or 3 times. I can’t recall ever having a one-on-one conversation with her. In the realm of his-hers-&-ours friendships, this was definitely a his.

Considering I was out of town doing fun and exciting things, the incident got shuffled to the back of my mind. However, over the past few days it has started to resurface. I’ve probably given it more head space than it deserves, but it’s starting to bother me.

What exactly does Shelly want? There’s motive to everything we do. Sometimes it’s benign. Sometimes not. I get it – I have trust issues, I’m jaded. However, our connection is so tenuous that I have a hard time taking her overture at face value. It’s far more plausible that her intent was colored by outside influence.

I didn’t respond. I have no interest in connecting.  I am actively reducing links to folks who I once considered ours but am starting to realize are truly his. I’ve had ongoing issues with persons unknown giving The Douche reports on my activities.

On one hand it’s frustrating that three years later these things are still cropping up. On the other, we were together for 60% of my adult life, so it shouldn’t be surprising.

I’m still drowning in unexpected, lingering trifles that compose the price tag of divorce.


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